I was attending the lecture of a very good professor at McGill a few weeks ago. The guy is really cool, a good speaker, he always gets the message across even to the most butt-headed audience, he always answers even the dumbest questions and he makes jokes! All in all a true delight for science lovers.
So I get all cozy in the chair, I browse through some papers that I had with me but I can’t concentrate. You know why? Because of the MORONS staying behind me. They were undergrads as far as I could tell and they would not shut up. At that point I was not that pissed off because the lecture hadn’t started and it was actually quite entertaining to hear them debate about yellow and whether it was cool or not. Yellow! A debate on yellow…
Chick: “So what did you wear at X’s birthday party?”
Dude: “My yellow shirt. You know it don’t you?”
Chick: “Wow, that’s pretty yellow”.”
Dude: “Yeah, so?”
Chick: “Nothing, I’m just saying. I don’t think yellow is that cool a color. And I don’t think it would look good on you, that’s all. But that’s just me.”
Which literally set the dude on fire, and I mean ON FIRE! Sadly that’s when my nerves were beginning to be pulled beyond their inherent elasticity. The lecture had started, the science was calling me, and I could not answer because some idiots would not see eye to eye on what side of the chromatic spectrum is en vogue.
Dude: “If you must know, yellow is really IN now. Especially that hue of pale yellow I was wearing.”
Chick: “THAT is not pale yellow. It burns my retinas and it’s so not hot! It was hot last year, but not now. I think you’d look better in more autumnal colors. They go better with your hair.”
Dude: “You think?”
[Insert title statement here.]
I was certainly not expecting this, especially from people who have made clear their desire to pursue a career in science and not as editors of Seventeen magazine. There’s only so much I can tolerate when it comes to talking while someone more important than you is talking: boyfriends who are not living up to expectations, peak oil, the economy and maybe waterproof mascara.
What do you do in such a situation?
a) You turn around and tell them to shut it.
b) You transfer to a more quiet area.
c) You ignore them.
d) You punch them in the face.
e) All of the above in the order of your choosing.
I must admit I was dying to go with d), my fingers were beginning to clench and my knuckles to turn freakishly white but I figured that would be so un-lady-like and I refrained myself. I just turned around and gave them my “you either shut up or so help me” look which was enough to get the message through.
Did they say the eff word in their thoughts associated with my name? Maybe. If so it explains those bad karmic points they probably hailed my way that summed up to my tripping on my shoe lace when I stepped out of the room at the end of the lecture!
Old, decrepit buildings in Bucharest