Phil recently wrote something about his dreams. Which reminded me of my own dreams and made me think “hey, why not write about it on my blog so that everyone can read it? I’ve written about more embarrassing stuff than the result of built-up subconscious matter that are my dreams. Plus, the Internets are really good listeners”.
So Internets, get ready for it.
I’ve never understood how some people could have the same “back in high school and naked” dream over and over again. I had never had recurrent dreams until a few months ago.
I don’t know what the spark that ignited the pent-up angst and inner turmoil was but it resulted in very vivid dreams of my highschool days.
And before we go on, you should know something about my highschool days: I was a good student, a very good one in fact. Maths, Physics, Biology – a straight A student. So when time came for the final exams at the end of highschool there was not a single fiber that felt anxious or stressed or uneasy in my body. And the exams came and went like a soft breeze leaving a high grade behind. This being said, you realize that any memories I may have of those times don’t make me want to have my brain washed but are often accompanied by a tacit “oh, the good ol’ days!”
This leaves me with no explanation for the dream where I’m sitting in my old classroom, at my old desk, next to my friend whom I’ve shared that desk with for 4 years, only to realize that oh, man, I’ve got a big Math exam in 3 weeks and I haven’t studied for it. So I ask my friend “what’s the exam on?”. “Everything” she says. What? And at that point I’m really trying to remember what I was supposed to be remembering and… nothing.
Nothing comes to mind, except for a faint, very vague memory that at some point in grade 11 we learnt about matrices and determinants and that at the time I knew the exact Leibniz formula for calculating a determinant.
That feeling right there is scary! Scarier than the realization that you’re supposed to give a speech in front of your whole school but that whoops! you’re buck naked.
I think that amount of pressure is too close to the cooking point of my brain because that’s when I usually wake up. That’s me in the dream world, I don’t stick around when the going gets tough. “So I actually need to study for this exam? Oh, shoot! I just remembered there’s something I’ve got to do. You know, wake up.”
Back in what I like to call thank-God-THIS-is-the-real-world, this whole experience is followed by a mental “Phew” and an eventual “I’m hungry. I think I’ll surprise myself with a bowl of Cocoa puffs”.
On the same topic: what do you think about learning German while you’re sleeping? You took German at University, right Alex? How about giving you a nice little nightmare about this, on the house, free of charge?
Oh, German. I tried to love you, I really did. We struggled for 3 years in a love-hate relationship. I loved the thought of being able to watch Pro7 and actually understand something but I hated your awful grammar and long composite words.
You’re still in my head, German, my subconscious still thinks of you. I know it, even if it’s trying to think of you behind my back. The damn dreams gave it away. The dreams accompanied by the horror that comes with the idea that I have to take an exam in German when the only thing I know in Deutsch is “Du hast mich gefragt, und ich hab nichts gesagt” from Rammstein’s “Du hast”.
Again, Internets, this scares the bejesus out of me. And again, I can’t explain the feeling of sheer relief when I realize that in the real world where I rightfully belong I DON’T have to prove my knowledge in Deutsch to anyone. I think I’ll surprise myself with a bowl of Cocoa puffs.
How about you? Any recurrent dreams you’re tormented by?